Does your child want to quit sports?

It might be OK.  Many children want to quit playing because they’re simply not interested anymore. The main reason kids play sports is to have fun and be with their friends.  Winning isn’t as big a priority for them.  Parents should support them, encourage personal growth, and not unrealistically compare them to professional athletes when they do play.  And when they decide to hang up their cleats and go do something else, it might be best, but only under the right circumstances.

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Learning from mistakes

Donald Trump is known for a lot of things. Making (and losing) riches is one of them.  One of Trump’s truisms is, “The second developer in is usually the one who makes the money.”  By this, he means the first developer made the mistake of purchasing a property, pulling permits, and laying pipe only to realize his cash flow projections were off.  So he sells for pennies on the dollar.  And moguls like Trump swoop in.

Mistakes are costly, in finance and in life.  But a willingness to seek counsel can help you minimize them. Teach your kids who to seek counsel from and encourage them to ask often.

What others think

You know, intellectually, that you cannot manage how others view you. You know that there will be those who don’t like you and will gossip about you. In fact, it has been said that twenty-five percent of your circle of acquaintances and friends will not like you, and there is nothing you can do to change their opinions. Since we cannot fully manage other’s view of us, let it go. Scripture tells us to please God, not man. Begin today to focus on how God sees you, seeking His approval and not the approval of man. 

This applies to our kids too…

The gift of counter-pressure

On April 10, 1963, the nuclear attack submarine Thresher was no more. Its deep-dive trials southeast of Cape Cod came to a cataclysmic end and all 129 men aboard perished in 8,400 feet of water. The nuclear reactor probably shorted out and the sub did not have enough power to stop itself from sinking to the bottom and getting crushed by massive water pressure.  It was a tragedy.

It’s interesting to note that while a state-of-the-art submarine was crushed under immense pressure, there were thinly-scaled fish happily swimming around the accident site.  How is that possible?  Because the pressure inside the sea creatures was as great as the water pressure outside them.  They were equipped to withstand their environment.

What a great parenting parable.  Our goal is to make our children so full of faith and happiness on the inside that they won’t get crushed under enormous peer and media pressure on the outside.  We need to give them the gift of counter-pressure.

Modesty

What does modesty mean?  That is a good question to ask your sons and daughters.  It is especially good to address this if you have a pre-teen daughter.  “All the girls at school are wearing these, why can’t I?”… “It’s my body; shouldn’t I decide what to put on it?”  These questions reflect the timeless struggle between teen girls and their parents over the issue of modesty. This issue is more critical than ever in today’s society, where pre-teens are encouraged by the media and peers to act and dress years older than they actually are. Everywhere you look, young girls – whether in real life, on television, or in advertisements – are dressed in ways that emphasize their sexuality and, to be blunt, degrade the value of female character.  This makes for a good conversation and you might be surprised on how much your daughters agree with you.  They just need to hear it.

Planting a moral compass

We want to be liked. We want to fit in. We want to be invited. We want to do what others are doing. Well, so do our children. And they’re especially vulnerable during their impressionable teen years – a  time when they are seeking their identity as a person. So we need to show our children, by example, how to stand against what is wrong and stand for what is right… no matter what others may think or say.

And we need to plant a moral compass in our children that will help them safely find their way through this sometimes dangerous jungle called life. That is our job as parents.

What happens if my child is picked on?

We all remember being in junior high and kids tormenting us on the way we dressed or the zits that surfaced on our face.  Well, nothing’s changed since then.  If anything, things have gotten worse.  At some point, your kids will be singled out and made fun of.  And it will hurt.  So, as a parent, there are a few things you can do.

First, share with your children that getting teased is a normal part of growing up and that you went through it and survived. Then, tell them that the person giving them grief is probably insecure and only thrives on putting others down. Finally, and most importantly, make sure you reinforce over and over to your child how much you love them, and reiterate all the positive things about them